September Blog

September Blog
 I wrote this back in September at a low point. Think of it as a 'wee chat with myself'

So September has come and nearly gone. The leaves are turning into Autumn colors as am I although they are going brilliant reds and oranges and I’m going silver and beige.

Coming back from Edinburgh was a bump. Exhausted mentally I knew it was going to be hard but I didn't realize how hard. I've always misjudged September. It starts as 'Hey September's here, let's get going' and then there's three weeks of slog before it actually does.

I also have the annual self assessment/critique that comes with a birthday on the 24th. This year is a big one- FIFTY! Yes it deserves capitals. Fifty means my youth is over and the end game begins. That's not as bad as it sounds. I'm going into my fifties fitter that i was at 25, wiser than i was at 25, better resourced than I was at 25. And with realistically expectation of years of full health left there's a lot to be done. There will be upsets and knock backs along the way but that's never a reason not to start anything. If I was comfortable with life I’d be very tempted to be a silver sofa surfer.

I find that Edinburgh gave me insight into skills I didn't think I was very good at. Skills that will change this second half of  my life. The skills of planning, preparation, troubleshooting and engaging with strangers were honed. Most of all, the skill of accepting failure. which means i can now take the risks i need to take without fear crippling me from the outset.

Obviously I take with me the fears and doubts that have shaped my life but they might just be a little more manageable now I’m aware of them.

So my September blues have past and my birthday’s gone (thanks for all the kind wishes)

In many ways, the more significant anniversary is Mambalsa’s first birthday. October the 4th 2014 was the first Mambalsa event. Sarah Jewels birthday party in Islington. Grace and I did a full on Mambalsa taster which went down very well. The following day was the first ever Mambalsa development workshop.

And a year later......

Well it’s been quite odd. I’m more convinced than ever that Mambalsa has a place in the pantheon of partner dancing. I played with it for a year and discovered so much about it and me.  Thomas Edison famously said “I have not failed, I’ve just discovered a thousand ways not to make a light bulb” (why doesn't anyone give credit to the guy who invented the light switch?) and so it is with marketing Mambalsa. I group my marketing misadventures into:

Shyness- a childish word but it fits. It’s tough shouting to the world “Hey I’m here and I’ve created this..” When I do the reaction has nearly always positive and yet although it’s easy to talk the talk and walk the walk, believing in the talk as you walk is hard! So  more effort and more practice is required, but it’s becoming less uncomfortable with practice.

Mixed messages- This was a major flaw in the Edinburgh show marketing and may well have been a flaw in the show as well. Am I selling a dance or a show? Am I selling a dance or an event? Am I selling the effects of the dance or the dance?

Certainly the Edinburgh show should have been aimed at non dancers. ‘Why He Can’t Dance! A massive potential audience compared to those who are interested in partner dancing and not even one they do!

Time Management-

I’ve never considered myself even barely competent at it. I’ve got books on time management but never got around to finishing them. Edinburgh gave me deadlines and a positive goal. I dove into tasks and got into the ‘flow’. Now I’m back I've vague unbelievable dreams/goals and I’m relying on the deadlines of failure i.e.  ‘it must get done or else’.

and yet.

My shyness has become an inconvenience rather than a barrier. My awareness of it means I can plow through it and give myself a pat on the back.

My marketing messages can be clarified like my street corner flyering pitch. Four words that work. Just knowing my shyness's potential to limit everything I do, makes me want to clarify my messages.

I’m even finally reading one of those books on time management!